..the Korean Drama Phase

They say that when someone appear in your dreams, it means that they miss you terribly. Well, Gun Jun Pyo, Beuk Seung Jo, Tae Kyung, Shin Woo you all must miss me terribly eh..? :P

Boys over flower was my first ever korean :P, I don’t know from where I got it. It was during my last semester of B.Tech, which meant that I had loads of free time in hand. Initially, I only had 20 episodes (the series has 25 episodes). I remember being so addicted to it, that I’d stay up till wee hours to complete the episodes. After which I started asking around for the remaining five, because I was so interested in knowing how it ended up !!

Then, for a brief period Korean movies took up my attention (I have stayed in hostel for comparatively short time, and as anyone who has stayed in hostel will know, it is one of a kind movies/series repository). I have no idea who actually started watching all these, I mean, its Korean, who would think ‘Oh, I’m bored today, let me download some Korean movies and watch it!!’. But who ever did it, you are the one I’m holding responsible for this phase (and I’m quite thankful to you also). :P

College got over, so did the supply of movies and series. And Boys Over Flower’s charm seemed to lessen day by day( it was most captivating during my semester exam days :P). After almost two months of joblessness my call letter came, and  it was Chennai. Hostel again, but this time it was quite different. Eventhough I stayed at a working women’s hostel back in Kochi, this one was way different. After three months of staying here, I still have no idea about the names or whereabouts of people staying in my neighboring rooms..!

I thought my movie days were over. But thankfully for me, I found more Korean crazy people in my training batch, and listening to their list, I knew that I was way behind!! (btw, I always thought Korean thing was exclusive to Keralites, but Andra people are way too deep into it!).

After training was the glorious bench period, again a state of paid joblessness. However what people tend to forget to mention is that how boring it gets. Korean drama rescued me. It was day in and day out of series, one after another, to the extend that whenever I see a Koren national in my workplace, I get this huge feeling of,what to say, kinship? Bond? As if you have known them for years together!!! :D :D

I’m still in that phase, eventhough story line of every series is same, a heavily complicated triangle love story between talented (and beautiful, clear skinned) teens, its still entertaining. J

As for my dreams, I’ll rather hold the overdose of Korean drama as the cause, I’m pretty sure that the people I mentioned, don’t even know I exist L

..swimming lessons :)

We live in our papa’s ancestral ‘tharavadu’ and we have our own natural pond, kulam, in the backyard..! During the summers the water dries up to the very bottom, right till you can spot the uruva – the source of the water and during monsoon it fills up with amazingly blue water :) .

(anyone is welcome to check out my kulam, drop into my house during monsoon :) )

view from near motorshed.. :)

Front view.. :)

I would hav got a more clearer focused pic, but i saw a snake, so thought better of it..!!

Papa taught us (me and my brother) swimming. I was in LKG when I learned to swim. In the beginning I was out in a tube, with floaters on each hand, and a sari tied up to my middle, with papa holding the other end. He would then move up to the wall’s of the pond, and ask me to swim a small distance between the walls of the pond. Then, I was made to swim the length of the pond. Then I did it without the tube, then without floaters, and finally without the sari. J

I even used to have proper swimsuit back then. I used to adore it, and wore it on every possible time. I don’t remember what happened to it..! (I probably grew out of it, but probably didn't stop wearing it, so I think amma would have done something sinister to that, to stop me from wearing it..!)

I've always loved swimming underwater as opposed to normal swimming. And, what I loved more than swimming was jumping into the water from all sorts of heights, the walls surrounding, the trees on the edge, from above the motor shed, all kinds of places. I was never allowed to be in the pond on my own till I was in my 7^th or so (I really can’t blame my parents for that, children end up dead in ponds!!). My brother always had to be with me. And back when we were kids, that was not really a problem because both of us loved water!! We played games like hiding coins in the water and seeking it(God only knows how many coins we lost!), who can hold the breath the longest underwater, who can dive the longest distance, who can float the longest distance without moving a limb, and finally, who can stand upside down, under water most perfectly.

 He was the one who taught me jumping, basically I would climb up the wall and look down water, get scared, climb down again, gather my courage, get up again, and the cycle followed for almost 2 days. And I used to be sad because, brother had perfected the jump by then and he looked like he loved it. I begged my brother to teach me, so he came up with me on the wall, asked me to take a deep breath and he pushed me into water without warning. I have never stopped jumping into water after that!! :D

No matter how much we fought, we used to be together when asking our parents for swimming permission. Once we were in the pond, we’ll stay there hours long, till finally, amma comes and pulls us out of the water. We stayed in such a long time that when we got out, our eyes were red, and when we looked on to a lighted bulb, we could see rainbow halos. J

Occasionally, we would be joined by our neighbour’s kids or our cousins. Everyone in our locality learned to swim in our kulam. J

It really takes 2-3 days of continuous rain to fill up the pond. There is a chaal , a small channel on the 3^rd step from the top, so that when the water gets excess, it will flow through this channel into the paddy fields behind our land. So our pond never actually flooded. Even now, when the water fills up, I take a dip, but the fun isn’t there anymore( also because there isn’t anyone to look out, I get scared that a snake would show up and you know, I’d have to suffer the consequences :P). May be when I have kids, they get old enough to swim, the fun will come back J

.. a happy day :)

From time immemorial, I've only prayed or taken the God’s name when things get difficult. Difficult has different interpretation at different ages, at 8 it was when I broke the torch, and stacked it away  in the shelf. At 12, it was when I lost yet again another gold earring. At 15, it was when board results announced and I didn't quite make the mark everybody expected I’d get. At 17 it was when I didn't get through the medical entrance (the aftershocks of which I still experience even now, once in every year my mother reminds me that I could have been doing MBBS, when the fact is that I've completed my B.tech, and that was done really well too). And now, well it defines a whole new set of things..!!

I started writing personal diary a long time back, almost into my 10^th standard. I took up all those diaries and read through it, and what I realized was that all the days I've written something were the sad days. Even then I used to overdo stuff.. the tear stains through the spread ink was very much visible. So, in short, anyone going through my personal diary (like when I end up dead/famous, and the world/nosy kids/grandkids wanted to know the thoughts in the little prodigy me) all they are gonna end up with will be a detailed version of whining me, saying how unfair my life is, how partial my parents are to my brother, how high school musical is never even close to my high school experience, and a detailed description of how my life would have been, had I been born as a princess(I used to, and still have a very vivid imagination..!!).

There was not a single happy day recorded.

But I had plenty of those days. Between my two types of hormones, crappy people, and mind numbing assignments, I have had some of the awesomest days ever. It’s just that I never wrote down anything when I am happy. I don’t need God or my diary when I am happy (that’s a blasphemous thought, but I do not mean it like that.. I do need God when I am happy, I just tend to forget that a bit). So, I am writing this post, to remind me that I had plenty of happy days, and I’m most grateful for all of those.

And, now again I’m happy, because I had a good talking session with another kindred spirit (I fell in love with the word “kindred spirit” after reading Anne Of Green Gables) , someone other than my friend actually read and commented on one of my post, and it didn't rain a single drop today(I love rain, but week-long rain leaves all the clothes damp and hard to dry).

So, that’s it. I am happy. And every single time I come across this post, I will be happy again. J

Things that make me happy:-

1. Good book

2. Good films

3. Good food

4. Travelling

5. Good talking session with my friends

6. Hot maggi and tea on a rainy evening

7. Being home alone

8. Getting control of tv remote

9. High balance on phone+ net offer+ message offer

10. New shoes

11. New clothes, and

12. Black diamond ring ;)

See, I’m a simple person J :P

..hunting lessons :P

Its depressing

The never ending hunt for grooms. Its depressing because I haven’t yet viewed a profile that screams “marry me, I am the one for you.”  I thought it will be fun, but after going through numerous profiles I realised why people go for love marriages. There is no fun people. Everyone is so serious, and over age. I’m 22 when I am writing this, and every single interest/ proposal I’ve got so far is 27-28. Looks like rest of the folks decided to find themselves brides without the aid of matrimony site.

And, what I cannot understand is my father’s need to get me hitched off this fast!

Yes, my horoscope says that I have to be married before 24, or wait after 30 (yes we believe in that stuff..!), above that, mine is a sudhajathakam, something difficult to find, and if found difficult to match (discovered dashasanthi recently.. :P), and adding to it even thinking about living off with a complete stranger, doesn't look glamorous at all. Nope, not anymore.

When I was a kid, I used to love marriages, loads of people, loads of goodies, and loads of fanfare. Cousins ragging the to be bride/groom, meaningful looks (none understood then, but now, its a different story :P) passed around, snide comments, general happiness around. And I've had cliched images built up even then in my mind about the marriage(aided by the films and serials mainly), and I couldn't wait to grow up and get married!!

But I didn't expect this sense of insecurity. Its even scary. Every parent is looking for a good homely girl to complete their son’ s life. No one wants a fun loving, slightly eccentric, highly emotional, overly sensitive, in short, a real person for their son. Not that my profile exhibits these characteristics, my profile is ideal one. Any unsuspecting parent will certainly love it, NO, I’m not being fake. I can adjust, trust me I can adjust well enough. It will like killing off existing me, and replacing an impeccable daughter-in-law.

But, I do not want that. Is it too much to ask, to continue like I am now, carefree, talkative, reacting little girl of the family. Couldn’t growing up wait a little more..??? We hear amazing stories about fantastic couples who came together through arranged marriages, all I am asking for is a fairytale, can I get one..?? L

... ink !! ;)

Pretty, isn't it..??
Sadly, it's still on someone else's body..!
I have no idea how exactly my love for tattoos started. No one I know personally has got any yet..! Still, I'm really fascinated by the idea of getting ink on my body.
May be TLC is responsible, they have this show, where we get to see people getting tattooed. Yes, its going to hurt (they also said threading hurts, it was bearable pain only. Nothing worth screaming your head off !! )
Or may be, its the saying "the only thing you can take to your grave is tattoo", I know, I know, tacky.

Anyways, getting inked is on my bucket list. I think this one will look really pretty on my back neck. Or maybe on the safer note, on my arm..(safe as in, from parents. Just to be really really safe, maybe I should wait till after marriage. My father got me to take down half of my interests from my matrimony profile, obviously, people are looking for girls with adakkom othukkam..! Hah!! Long drives, and tattoos obviously makes a girl sound unruly, doesn't they??  )

Life’s little etiquette conundrums..

I’m pretty sure that Reader’s Digest subscribers come across this title once in every month. I borrowed the title from them.. Because I couldn’t think of any other title without any bitterness.

I take things to heart, and therefore even little things like a word or gesture is more than enough to hurt me and make me fret over for days. This is applicable only to things and people I care.

Recently, I found out that one of the teachers, who taught me at school, had not yet accepted my friend request. And yes, I did see this teacher as an important person, and was surprised at this. It must have been atleast a year since I send her the request.

Asking around, I did find the reason. I framed my request in inappropriate terms. As opposed to being a student, when she read my request(you have an option for letting a person who you are when sending a request), she got the feeling that I was in an overly friendly manner, like a familiar friend. Unfortunately I cannot remember the exact wordings I wrote..!!  What I remember is along these lines “ hello maam, how are you? Hope you are doing fine. ”  But definitely there must have been more to it, which must have offended her. Did I mention I do hope you remember me?? I have no idea. But what I do remember is that I did spent quite some time on that request, composing it. Maybe I should have send the request and ended it there..!!

Nevertheless, I was really hurt. And thinking back, there was this incident in which I came straight across her, at the school gate and she completely ignored me. I did try to make her look at me, so that I can smile and say ‘namaste teacher’, but she didn’t even acknowledge me being there. I thought then, that maybe it was because she was late, and there must have been a number of things going around her mind, but now I think it may be because of this request stuff (it’s quite funny, how you think you must have forgotten some things, but at the correct moment they come up.. this usually goes for unexplained stuff, things that was not resolved before..!).

Needless to say, right now I am little mad at her, because she is a grown up and above it a teacher. Maybe she could have messaged me directly reprimanding me, or said something to that effect on that school gate situation, but instead she decided to, I don’t know, give me the silent treatment?? Seriously??!! Had something like that happened I would have emerged wiser, and would have forgotten all about it then and there. Instead, I am sitting here, boiling over, trying to remember what exactly did I write, which offended her so much..!!

And wondering whether I should apologize for it..! But what exactly do I apologise for, and seeing that she did not indeed care enough to correct me, should I care enough for apologising..?I’ve been thinking about it for over a week now and  I reached the conclusion that I do not , maybe she isn’t meant to be in the high pedestal where I used to put her in.

..the very Incredible India

Incredible India..!
It's the place where girls, as young as five year old gets brutally raped and the police offers 2000 rupees to the parents not to register the case. Incredible indeed.

Women is considered as lesser being by most of the people in India, hence the female feticide.And do not think it is the illiterate rural folks who are at it, its most widely done in the urban upper class . In one sense it is better, than the baby growing up and facing more atrocities on the way.

I am not saying that India is the only place where crimes of such inhuman nature occurs, what I am
saying is that India is the only place where such crimes occur and the maximum punishment that can be handed off is a lifetime sentence, 12 or so years in prison. Is  so many years of free accommodation, food and paid labor going to deter the next person from committing the same crime..? I don't think so.

Punishment needs to install a sense of terror in everybody's mind, like when I was little, "I will tell this to your papa when he gets home " was all that was needed to bring out my best behaviour. I've read about the life in prison in other countries, only a born criminal can withstand that life, and generally people tend to avoid it. But over here, its better than the life outside for most of them.

India is the second populous country in the world, and main majority of its population is poor, "below poverty line". The Government on its part has passed out policies ensuring food provisions at a discounted rate from PDS outlets and the 100 days of work for everyone,but the non-poor society implementing these schemes cannot just get enough for themselves..!!

It is indeed very much difficult situation, but we have the manpower as well as the intellectual power to make changes in these situation, we only need a great leader, someone who can make use of our resources to the betterment of the country as a whole, and not just their personal life.

I do believe that such a change will come about, however late. We have identified our vices long back, and their solutions too, just the implementing part is lagging.